🎁 Preorder bonus: a free ticket to my live Father Wound Virtual Retreat on Saturday, October 24 ($297 value).
THE NEW BOOK FROM TERRI COLE • OUT OCTOBER 27
FATHER WOUND
FATHER WOUND
Break Unhealthy Patterns to Reclaim Your Worth and Power
Break Unhealthy Patterns to Reclaim Your Worth and Power
At its core, a father wound is a worthiness wound. In Father Wound, licensed psychotherapist and bestselling author Terri Cole names the injury underneath so many women's struggles with love, boundaries and self-worth, and shows you how to finally heal it.
"This is the book so many of us didn't know we needed, a compassionate, grounding read that meets you exactly where you are. If you've ever wondered how your past is shaping your present, this is where you start."
— Nedra Glover Tawwab, licensed therapist and New York Times bestselling author of Set Boundaries, Find Peace
What if the patterns you keep trying to change have roots you've never fully understood
What if the patterns you keep trying to change have roots you've never fully understood
You might have a father wound if…
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You're drawn to people who are emotionally unavailable.
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You over-give, over-function or over-achieve to feel worthy.
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You struggle to ask for help because depending on others doesn't feel safe.
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You feel responsible for holding everything, and everyone, together.
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You crave closeness but have a hard time fully trusting it.
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You stay in relationships longer than you know you should.
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You always felt like something was off with your dad
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Here's the thing. Those patterns are adaptations. Somewhere along the way, they kept you safe. The question is whether they're still running your life now.
Maybe your father was absent. Maybe he was physically there but emotionally unavailable.
Maybe he was loving in some ways and hurtful in others. Maybe you have a good relationship with him now. Maybe you had a great dad but, like all of us, you were raised in a patriarchy. (Which, let’s be honest, is the original “Bad Daddy”)
Maybe he was loving in some ways and hurtful in others. Maybe you have a good relationship with him now. Maybe you had a great dad but, like all of us, you were raised in a patriarchy. (Which, let’s be honest, is the original “Bad Daddy”)
You can love your father and do this work.
It isn't about blaming him. It's about you: what you learned about love, safety, worth and trust, and choosing what you want to carry forward.
A Father Wound Is A Worthiness Wound.
A Father Wound Is A Worthiness Wound.
It can shape the way you love, work, achieve, give, receive, trust and relate to yourself. Father Wound is your roadmap for understanding how those early experiences are still showing up in your adult life, and for finally breaking the patterns that no longer serve you.
Inside the book, you'll learn how to:
Inside the book, you'll learn how to:
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IDENTIFY
how your unique father wound shows up in your relationships, choices, boundaries and self-worth.
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INTEGRATE
INTEGRATE what happened, using practical, body-based tools for the patterns you can't simply "think" your way out of.
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RECLAIM
RECLAIM your worth and power, and create a life rooted in your own truth, pleasure and choice.
You can understand where a pattern came from without staying trapped inside it.
A Virtual Retreat for Women Ready to Heal Their Father Wound
SATURDAY, OCTOBER 24 · 12–4 PM ET · LIVE ON ZOOM
Part healing, part celebration.
A cozy, live afternoon to begin honoring your father wound, and to celebrate this book coming into the world, together.
Nobody has the book yet. That's the point.
You don't need to have read a single page to begin honoring and integrating your father wound. Reading about your patterns can show you where they came from. Doing this work live, in community with other women who truly get it, is where things start to shift.
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For four hours, we'll be together in real time. Here's what we'll do:
1. Ground first. We'll open with meditation and mindfulness practices, so your body feels safe enough to do this work.
2. Explore the types of fathers. Discover how the kind of father you had shaped what you learned about love, safety and your own worth.
3. Map your Father Wound Blueprint. Identify the adaptations and beliefs you built to stay safe as a girl, and notice which ones are still running the show.
4. Learn nervous system regulation. Practical, body-based tools you can use the moment an old pattern kicks in.
5. Ask me anything. Live Q&A, so you can bring the questions you've never had anywhere to take.
2. Explore the types of fathers. Discover how the kind of father you had shaped what you learned about love, safety and your own worth.
3. Map your Father Wound Blueprint. Identify the adaptations and beliefs you built to stay safe as a girl, and notice which ones are still running the show.
4. Learn nervous system regulation. Practical, body-based tools you can use the moment an old pattern kicks in.
5. Ask me anything. Live Q&A, so you can bring the questions you've never had anywhere to take.
And through all of it, you'll be in the room with women who understand. For so many of us, this is the part we've never had: saying the thing out loud and hearing someone else say, "Me too."
You can love your father and do this work. [CONFIRM: Cameras are optional, and you'll never be asked to share.]
Can't make it live? You'll get the full replay, available for 7 days, so you can watch at your own pace.
I didn't always know I had a father wound.
I didn't always know I had a father wound.
My dad was successful, hardworking and almost never home. He wasn't a bad man. He was emotionally unavailable, and for years I believed he'd really wanted a son.
I knew I was capable. Independent. High-functioning.
I also knew how much I longed for approval, and how easily that longing could direct the choices I made.
I learned to over-function. To work harder. To prove myself.
And like so many women, I kept recreating familiar emotional dynamics in my adult relationships without realizing just how familiar they were.
Eventually, I began to see the connection. The relationship we have with our father, or the one we needed and didn't get, can inform:
- What we believe we need to do to be loved.
- What we tolerate.
- What we chase.
- What we avoid.
- How much we trust.
- And, underneath all of it, what we believe we're worth.
Understanding my own father wound changed me. And after nearly three decades as a psychotherapist, I've seen versions of these patterns in countless women.
That's why I wrote Father Wound. Not so we can stay stuck analyzing the past. Not so we can blame our fathers forever. But so we can finally understand what happened, tend to what still hurts, and choose something different for ourselves.
This work is deeply personal to me. And I can't wait to begin it with you, live, on October 24.
— Terri
Meet Terri Cole
Meet Terri Cole
PYSCHOTHERAPIST · RELEATIONSHIP EXPERT · BEST SELLING AUTHOR
For nearly three decades, Terri Cole has helped people break dysfunctional patterns, create healthier boundaries and build more fulfilling relationships with themselves and others.
She is the bestselling author of Boundary Boss and Too Much, and has reached millions of people through her books, courses, podcast and online community.
If you've done the work of Boundary Boss or Too Much with me, Father Wound goes one layer deeper, to where so many of those patterns began.
What You'll Discover Inside Father Wound
What You'll Discover Inside Father Wound
This isn't a book about staying stuck in the past. It's about understanding the past well enough to stop unconsciously recreating it.
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DISCOVER YOUR FATHER WOUND BLUEPRINT.
Identify the specific experiences, adaptations and beliefs that shaped the way you relate to yourself and others.
Identify the specific experiences, adaptations and beliefs that shaped the way you relate to yourself and others.
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SEE THE PATTERNS CLEARLY.
Understand how your father wound may be affecting your romantic relationships, boundaries, self-worth, independence, achievement and ability to receive.
Understand how your father wound may be affecting your romantic relationships, boundaries, self-worth, independence, achievement and ability to receive.
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GRIEVE WHAT YOU DIDN'T GET.
Make room for the truth about what you needed, what may have been missing and what still deserves acknowledgment.
Make room for the truth about what you needed, what may have been missing and what still deserves acknowledgment.
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LEARN TO REPARENT YOURSELF.
Give yourself the safety, validation, protection and care you may have spent years seeking from someone else
Give yourself the safety, validation, protection and care you may have spent years seeking from someone else
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WORK WITH YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM.
Use practical, body-based tools to create change that goes beyond intellectual insight.
Use practical, body-based tools to create change that goes beyond intellectual insight.
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BREAK GENERATIONAL CYCLES.
Recognize what was handed down to you, and decide what ends with you.
Recognize what was handed down to you, and decide what ends with you.
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RECLAIM YOUR WORTH + POWER.
Create relationships and a life that reflect who you are now, not the wounds you learned to adapt around.
Create relationships and a life that reflect who you are now, not the wounds you learned to adapt around.
What People Are Saying About Father Wound
What People Are Saying About Father Wound
"The pain we carry from childhood can follow us into our relationships, our choices, and the way we treat ourselves. Terri Cole's Father Wound book offers a revolutionary guide to identifying, understanding, and healing those wounds with honesty, compassion, and self-awareness."
— Yung Pueblo, #1 New York Times bestselling author
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"Few relationships impact and shape a woman's inner world as deeply as the relationship she has, or does not have, with her father. In Father Wound, Terri Cole compassionately explores the lasting imprint the father wound has on a woman's relationships, self-worth, and sense of identity. Cole offers readers the gift of profound validation while also laying out a clear path toward healing the patterns that keep them from living the life and having the relationships they most deeply desire. This is a much-needed book that will move the needle for so many."
— Vienna Pharaon, LMFT, bestselling author of The Origins of You
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"This is the guide women have needed for a long time. In Father Wound, Terri Cole helps us understand the pain we inherited, name the patterns that shaped us, and reclaim our voice."
— Tamsen Fadal, New York Times bestselling author and host of The Tamsen Show
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"A daughter's relationship with her father becomes the emotional blueprint she carries into adulthood, shaping her sense of self, intimacy, and connection. In Father Wound, Terri Cole uncovers the lasting and often unspoken impact of paternal dynamics and patriarchal conditioning on women's lives and relationships. Through thoughtful reflections, practical tools, and empowering revelations delivered with compassion, clarity, humor, and insight, she offers us an invaluable guide to understanding our patterns and forging our unique path to growth and healing."
— Alexandra H. Solomon, PhD, adjunct professor at Northwestern University, MasterClass instructor, and bestselling author of Love Every DaY
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"Father wounds often live beyond conscious awareness, shaping how women protect themselves, attach to others, and survive emotional pain. In Father Wound, Terri Cole brings clinical expertise, psychological depth, and practical guidance to this essential topic, helping readers understand the roots of their suffering and begin the deeper work of healing."
— Frank Anderson, MD, Harvard-trained psychiatrist and author of Transcending Trauma and To Be Loved
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"As a couples therapist and psychologist, I see the father wound shaping the way women relate to themselves, love others, and move through the world. Terri Cole brings both depth and compassion to this often-overlooked conversation. Father Wound offers a powerful reminder that you can deeply love your father and still carry wounds that affect your relationships, self-worth, boundaries, and emotional life. With honesty, insight, and practical guidance, Terri gives language to experiences so many women have carried silently for years, and shows them a path toward healing."
— Dr. Tracy Dalgleish, author, psychologist and relationship educator
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"With Father Wound, Terri Cole has written an exquisite masterpiece of the heart. For any woman who has ever felt like she was over-functioning to prove her worth, freezing around authority, or choosing partners from a blueprint she did not design, this book is the sanctuary you have been searching for. Seamlessly weaving her twenty-seven years of clinical wisdom with a profound, vulnerable warmth, Terri beautifully honors the complex truth that we can love our fathers while still grieving what was missing. This is not a book about blame; it is a long-overdue cultural awakening and a breathtakingly tender path to reclaiming your boundaries, your nervous system, and your unshakable right to finally come home to yourself."
— Sara Nasserzadeh, PhD, TED speaker and award-winning author of Love by Design
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"So many women spend years trying to fix symptoms without understanding the deeper wound beneath them. Whether it shows up as people-pleasing, perfectionism, difficulty trusting others, or constantly questioning your worth, the roots often run deeper than we realize. In Father Wound, Terri Cole brings warmth, wisdom, and compassion to this important conversation, helping readers understand how father-daughter dynamics can continue to shape their lives long after childhood. This book is an invitation to grieve what was missing, reclaim what was always yours, and build a more secure and loving relationship with yourself."
— Silvy Khoucasian, licensed therapist and relationship coach
This Is Bigger Than a Book.
This Is Bigger Than a Book.
I'm on a mission to help 10 million women stop abandoning themselves, break inherited patterns and reclaim their worth and power. Father Wound is part of that mission.
Because when one woman tends to the patterns she inherited, the impact doesn't end with her. It changes the way she loves. The way she parents. The way she speaks to herself. And what she passes forward.
Because when one woman tends to the patterns she inherited, the impact doesn't end with her. It changes the way she loves. The way she parents. The way she speaks to herself. And what she passes forward.
Your healing matters.
Your healing matters.
The book comes out October 27. You don't have to wait until then to begin.
The book comes out October 27. You don't have to wait until then to begin.
Preorder Father Wound today and join me live on October 24.
YOU'LL GET
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Your copy of Father Wound in hardcover, ebook or audiobook, from your favorite retailer.
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A free ticket to the Father Wound Virtual Retreat, a $297 live experience with me and a room full of women doing this work together.
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The full replay, in case you can't make it live.
YOUR COST: The price of the book (about $30, depending on retailer). YOUR RETREAT TICKET: $0. Claim anytime before we go live on October 24.
Frequently Asked Questions
Frequently Asked Questions
Preorder Father Wound from any retailer, then come back to this page and fill out the claim form with your order number. You'll get instant access to your ticket on the next page, and we'll email it to you too.
Yes. You can claim your ticket right up until the retreat starts: Saturday, October 24 at 12 PM ET.
No. Nobody has the book yet, since it comes out October 27. The retreat is designed so you can begin this work before you ever open it.
Yes. You can love your father and still carry patterns from that relationship, or from growing up in a patriarchy. This work isn't about blame. It's about you.
No. Cameras are optional, and sharing is always your choice.
You'll get the full replay, available for 7 days after the retreat.
No. Preorders from any retailer count. If yours isn't listed, you can still choose "Other" in the claim form.
Hardcover, ebook and audiobook all count.
Yes. You don't need to buy another copy. Just scroll to Step 3 and enter your existing order number.
It's in the confirmation email from your retailer. Search your inbox for the retailer's name or for "Father Wound." If you preordered in person, it should be on your paper receipt.
Yes. If you're ordering for a book club, team, clients or community, use our bulk order form below.
Your retailer handles shipping and will send you updates directly. For delivery questions, contact the retailer where you ordered.
Email support@terricole.com and our team will be happy to help.
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